I ran into a friend at church this morning who shared that her marriage that is currently being dismantled. My heart shook with sadness. Her marriage is ending after three and a half decades. I want to believe that that would never happen to me. However, suspicions are high that she had the exact same thought at some point in her marriage.
So what’s the point of it all? Why did I get married in the first place? Why to this man? What makes me stay with it?
Rest assured, in my mind there is a point. That will be dealt with shortly. First, why did I get married in the first place?
- It is the Biblical Model for family (Genesis 2:24 is the first mention of the word “wife”)
- It is traditional. – How I grew up and how I came to understand and interpret the world
- It’s what I desired (and still do).
Next question: Why this man? (I challenge any of you who read this to also make a list of why you married your spouse) Dan is a lover of nature. He’s a man of faith. He values family, marriage, children, and hard work. He likes to try new things. His curiosity motivates constant learning. We share common interests: faith, reading, traveling, backpacking, hiking, root beer floats.
What makes me stay with it? Three things: 1. Marriage is awesome 2. God helps me out (a lot) 3. I thrive off challenges and companionship.
Later in the day I was having a backyard chat with a neighbor and we were having a casual discussion about marriage realities. Marriage: not easy, not fun, not the stuff little girl dreams are made of– at least not all the time.
So again, what’s the point? Marriage is an opportunity to DAILY lay down your life for a friend. Marriage is an opportunity to sacrifice your wants, your preferences to another human’s. Marriage provides an opportunity to love and be loved unconditionally (or as best one can this side of Heaven). Marriage may lead to the blessing of bringing life into the world, up in the world and sending that life out to make a difference in the world.
Marriage is making a difference for me. I am committed to seeing it through ‘til death do us part’. I hope my children can see how remaining faithful to a promise isn’t always easy, but its results are beautiful.
Thank you Father God, for promising a Savior. Thank you for giving us Jesus and remaining faithful to your promises . Help me Lord, to remain faithful to the promise I made to Dan. Help me to lay down my selfishness in favor of love. Reach out to those who are hurting in their marriages and love on them, Lord Jesus. Amen!